When couples get married, many believe that they will be together forever. The romantic dream is to grow old with your spouse and to have decades of love and laughter. While some couples are lucky enough to realize this dream, others go through personal, financial or emotional changes that cause their marriages to become difficult. When a marriage becomes difficult enough, some couples have to decide if staying married is worth it. There are, of course, many factors that go into divorcing or separating and the issues will not be the same for any two couples. Each relationship is unique and has its own set of challenges and hardships. If you are at a place in your relationship where you are considering divorce, here are a few questions to ask yourself before you hire a divorce lawyer:
- Have we explored a trial separation? Perhaps you are unsure about whether or not a divorce is the correct route. In situations like this, some couples find that a trial separation is a helpful way to determine whether the marriage might be able to survive. If you have already worked with a legal separation attorney and found that a separation did not work for you and your spouse, you may want to move forward to divorce.
- Have we attempted counseling? Not all people believe in counseling or therapy, but some have seen improved relationships and communication skills when they work with a couple’s counselor. For some couples, it is helpful for them to meet with a counselor once or twice in order to gauge whether or not they think they might be positively impacted from the experience. Many couples will know pretty quickly whether or not couple’s therapy seems to be a good fit for them.
- Have we talked at length with our families? For couples who have children, it might be important to bring them into the discussion, especially if they are old enough to understand. You no doubt realize that divorce does not just affect the couple, but also the friends and family of the couple as well. Children are particularly at risk for experiencing confusion and anger about the situation, so it is important to assess what kind of role family conversation and honest will have in the process.
- Does divorce seem like the only way? Some couples try different tactics for years before deciding that divorce is the right decision. If you think about the ways you have tried to salvage the marriage, does it seem like you have tried every tactic available to fix the relationship? If so, this may make you feel more confident about proceeding with a divorce.
Divorce is difficult, no matter how you slice it, but when you are confident that it is the right move for you and your family, you can work with firms like Pollart Miller Family Law to help you proceed with your divorce in a way that is empathetic, efficient and useful not only to you and your spouse, but to your family as a whole.